Barbara-Lynn Freed, Contributing Writer
True Compassion develops after we have mastered the art of Forgiveness and learned to Love others unconditionally, for Compassion is an action of the transpersonal self. In this state of Beingness, we do not get entangled in the drama and emotions of the present challenge. Rather, we open our hearts to the people and situations at hand, without emotional attachment to pity, sorrow or suffering. Anything less, would be either sympathy or empathy.
By sympathizing (being in emotional agreement), or empathizing (feeling another’s emotions or pain), we become part of the problem, instead of part of the solution. For feeling another’s suffering, does not relieve their suffering. Only in a detached state can we truly hold space for that person to heal, or change their life. Practicing true compassion for another often means simply being present with them in silence.
Like Forgiveness, however, we must first find Compassion for ourselves, before we can truly feel Compassion for others. I learned this from a Tibetan Lama many years ago during a family crisis, where helping out, would have left me devastated emotionally, mentally and psychically. Rinpoche advised me that in this situation, I needed to have Compassion for myself, and that, like a good warrior, I needed to know when to advance and when to retreat. By following his guidance, I was able to release my feelings of guilt for abandoning my family in a time of need, and later, give them Compassion from afar.
About the Author
Barbara-Lynn Freed is the Founder and Facilitator of the Center for Transformational Studies where she helps people heal their core issues through her twenty-year old spiritual healing practice called Awakening the Heart!,and her Transformational Astrology readings, that focus on your Karmic challenges, evolutionary goals and your life’s true purpose. She also helps shamanic students connect with the spirits of nature through her three-year, cross-cultural, shamanic apprenticeship, called Resurrecting the Old Ways: Walking the Land & Honoring the Spirits in Right Relationship. Please visit her website for more information at http://
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