How to Spot an Environmentalist

Z, Contributing Writer
Waking Times 

Step one:

Look in the mirror. As long as you’re not a zombie, a slave, a sucker, or a sadomasochist, you’re an environmentalist.

Step two:

Ask yourself if you like breathing clean air. If the answer is yes, you’re an environmentalist. If the answer is no, you’re either a zombie or a slave.

Step Three:

Ask yourself if you like drinking clean water. If the answer is yes, you’re an environmentalist. If the answer is no, you’re a zombie.

Step Four:

Ask yourself if you like eating healthy food. If the answer is yes, you’re an environmentalist. If the answer is no, you’re either a zombie who enjoys human brains or a sucker to commercial media, fast food, Monsanto et al. If the answer is yes & no, you’re an experimenter who hopefully uses caution and moderation in your practices.

  • Step Five:

    Ask yourself if you enjoy engaging with healthy people. If the answer is yes, you’re an environmentalist. If the answer is no, you’re either a sadomasochist or a zombie. If the answer is yes & no, you’re an experimenter who hopefully uses caution and moderation in your practices.

    We’re all environmentalists, some of us just aren’t aware of it yet.

    If you like breathing clean air, eating healthy food, and drinking clean water then you are, by default, an environmentalist. If you’d rather live in a healthy environment than a polluted environment then you are an environmentalist. It really is that simple.

    If you are not living in a healthy environment, then you must ask yourself: what am I doing to achieve a healthy environment. If you act with courage in order to achieve a healthy environment, you’re an environmentalist. If you do nothing, you’re a zombie, a sucker, a slave, or a sadomasochist. Choose wisely.

    Glossary:

    Environmentalist: an eco-conscious human being.

    Experimenter: a human being who experiments with life. Caveat! Without moderation and caution, experimentation could lead to becoming a zombie or a slave.

    Sadomasochist: a human being who gets pleasure from acts involving the infliction or reception of pain or humiliation.

    Slave: a human being who is forced to be a piece of property for another human being.

    Sucker: a human being who has been duped, tricked, swindled, deceived, bamboozled, brainwashed, hoodwinked or fooled into believing something that is either not true and/or is unhealthy.

    Zombie: a living dead thing, or dead living thing, without brains that has an overwhelming hunger for brains.

    About the Author

    Z, a former Navy Intelligence Specialist turned philosopher, is the author of Birthday Suit of God and The Looking Glass Man. His works are inspired by the great philosophers of the ages and his wide awake view of the modern world.  His recent works can be seen here and also found at Z’s Hub.

    This article is offered under Creative Commons license. It’s okay to republish it anywhere as long as attribution bio is included and all links remain intact.

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