The Missing Fullness

Flickr - Crescent Moon - NASA Earth ObservatoryIda Lawrence, Contributor
Waking Times

“A life without love is a waste. ‘Should I look for spiritual love, or material, or physical love?’ Don’t ask yourself this question. Discrimination leads to discrimination. Love doesn’t need any name, category or definition. Love is a world itself. Either you are in, at the center … either you are out, yearning.” Shams Tabrizi

I’ve seen it, deep down, in myself and in so many people… a life without love in the full circle. Many of us see the great value of spiritual love, for ourselves and our world. We’ve been dedicated to it as a life path. And of course material love is natural. It’s a material world and we love the earth in all her beauty. But the physical… true self in love with another true self… intimacy… this is the love that slips to the low rung on the ladder.

It would be nice, we imagine, but quietly we believe we don’t deserve. Or we fear it because this love goes so deep that perhaps we won’t live up, or we could go vulnerable and lose it. So we remind ourselves of duty and obligation to the other two loves.

Is it a fact that if you open your heart to another human, you open your heart to the divine? Yes, it is so. We evolve through love and 3-D is the place where we do it. So, how about this question: is that divine dive into energetic/heart-communicating physical intimacy with a beloved the crème de la crème of evolutionary experience here? If the answer to this is yes, then why do so many sublimate the desire?

  • It’s reality, we say. I have to live in the real world: I have kids, I have a job, I have a relationship. It may not be divinely intimate, we’re not exactly on the same page, but it is comfortable enough. And besides, we have plans, and history, and I don’t trust this desire of mine… it feels selfish, dangerous and hurtful to others that I’m responsible for or obligated to. Absolutely no one would understand if I change, they would fight me all the way, my guilt would fight me all the way, so I can do without it.

    When we start out in life, we’re persuaded by conditioning to sacrifice for the common good. Common good asks you to forget about developing as an individual and drop those ideas of creating a new way that suits your spirit. Becoming whole… what is that foolishness! Love is a word we like to use, but it has strange, unloving outcomes.

    Quite a few folks hold to the common good pattern without much thought, and they agree to be less than they are. I would say the consciousness community has pretty much stepped out of this pattern. Where did we go?

    For some of us there seems to be a pre-born direction. Our spirit wishes to live not for the common good, but for the greater good. How can we negate greater good? To do so would be to negate the lives of some of the most honorable people, the greatest leaders; the magnificent ones who have done dedicated work involving great risk, sacrifice and sometimes even death. There is a greater good, and it could be a person’s karma, or destiny… an agreed upon task prior to entering 3-D.

    Thankfully the ‘greater good’ doesn’t necessarily exclude the ‘higher good’ of self-knowing and becoming whole. One would think these ‘goods’ live together – that love works as one energy; a world in itself as Trbrizi says. But strangely, our matrix so skillfully pulls us into discriminating… “You don’t have a right to the fullness of love…” it says. “You must choose and focus on this love or that.”

    The fullness missing in so many of our lives is the beloved… that twin spirit as some call it. Yes, we know there can be an intimacy wherein the energy and spirit have found a match. There can be one that you melt into and give up control… that one you knew before, or so it seems. We know that it is possible. Is it up to fate and not up to us, or can we call it forth? How do we invite the fullness of love if that is what we desire, or quietly dream of?

    It seems there is a prerequisite. Don’t neglect to fall in love with yourself first… your own divinity, your energy, your ‘being love’ journey. Bring the scattered parts of yourself together and come to know self… uncovered and loved ‘as is’.

    Within this uncovering is the flow of grace. It is there to help us forge our direction, and to forgive and correct ourselves. Yes, there is a lot of conditioning and programming that we’ve experienced; we’re burdened with negative experiences and opinions that ‘men are like this’ and ‘women are like that’. We learned to be afraid of an open heart, so the first love has to be granted to ourselves.

    Realizing there is no one outside of us who can complete us, we can forego waiting for the other half to walk into the room. Feminine energy and masculine energy – these are the ‘lover’ halves of ourselves: our inner divinity. Reverence for divinity in another begins within as we bring together our parts into the whole being. It’s done with the intention of overcoming the conditioning and the past hurts, accusations, rejections, prejudices, and the control trips.

    If love is intentional, can we open up to deep and connected intimacy with our current partner? Well, that would depend on the intention of both of course. Communication is needed, and in this matter, words really don’t carry that much importance. Most communication is non-verbal… it is a visual/audio read and an energy read. We know what we know just by feeling, and it’s pretty accurate. That’s why our personal work on allowing, accepting, respecting and going to a place of reverence is so vital.

    Some partnerships are for a limited purpose and some for a lifetime purpose. Let’s raise a family together; let’s do this ‘greater good’ work together; let’s build our careers and our wealth together; let’s take this spiritual journey together. Can the start-up purpose last until death do we part? It can, and when it does and that’s a beautiful thing. I wish for every couple a barriers-down heart to heart energy exchange until they leave this 3-D and move on. If the intent is there, why not?

    But for some, it hasn’t happened that way, and we know it. There is an emptiness… a realization: “I’ve never really been touched in my heart. I am a virgin to this intimate love.”

    There are miracles in 3-D, especially if we invite them. A twin spirit can walk into the picture… the synchronistic event… and the touch will be felt. It’s quite an experience: transformational and eye opening; leading directly inward to the true self. And it is followed by the question of, “Where do we go with this? Apparently we’ve called for it because it is here.”

    Accept it. If there is a heart communication, then it will sustain, as it always has. It may become the yearned for physical/spiritual intimacy, or it may not. There may be bliss or sorrow. We have to be brave enough for both possibilities, and consider both divine.

    The one thing that such love brings is trust. Our inner divinity is the most real part of us: when energy is communicating, what love we ask for from the deepest place, we receive. ‘Love IN love’ is evolutionary.

    About the Author

    Ida Lawrence is an author, blogger, copywriter and editor based in Atlanta, Georgia. She has contributed to and edited two books on racial justice and human rights, and numerous articles on human rights, self-empowerment and related subjects. Her latest book is entitled The Warrior’s Way to Heaven on Earth. Ida has also published a companion book of blog favorites from

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