I Tremble For My Country
Truth is a force that rises from the depths, descends from above, and slides in from the sides. It’s a force capable of shaking the ground we stand on… capable of changing everything. It actually is the ‘I AM’ force.
If you’re willing, today we’ll take a longer than usual walk, in some doo doo, keeping the boots on, and slugging on through. Maybe we’ll reach acceptance of what happened. Acceptance, in this case, is courageous, humbling, painful, loving, and the beginning of a particular kind of change… from turning away to turning toward.
Here we go then…
Politicians can spin, pundits can spin, ‘everything is a lie’ theorists can spin, activists can say, “Burn that symbol… that’ll solve it.” Nothing solves it until we stand still, let go of everything we think we know, take a deep breath, and say, “Yes, I recognize the smell of hell. What’s in here? What happened?”
Long ago, the idea of the superiority of one group of humans over others was inculcated into the consciousness through religion and politics. Men, with the ego’s self-interest as their primary motivation, created a God that chose their human family above all others.
Time passed, and into this darkness came a teacher with a message meant to take them into a more loving and inclusive heart space. When the teacher saw his message rejected, and he realized that it wasn’t time for him yet, he gave his life.
Opportunistic kings, queens and popes, knowing that his message and his death could be useful, made up a symbol and went after the people’s faith and their money. The directive was given to explore, conquer the world, carry the cross, and go for the gold.
One day the explorers came by ship to the Americas. They pillaged and plundered and millions died. Native peoples actually went extinct… such was the hell they were subjected to. We all know the story, or at least we ought to, so let’s go ahead to the next chapter.
The United States: this is where ‘divine right’ was refined into ‘white right’ and put to great use.
America’s founding fathers are revered for being high-minded, liberty-inspired men. No doubt they were wise in attempting to improve upon what they had known as subjects of kings. When they spoke of liberty, they spoke of their liberty, not that of the brown ‘Indians’ or the black ‘property’, or even their wives and daughters.
But that’s okay, we say. We understand that was the culture at the time. Minds change, laws change, and the government holds up as long as the foundation is good.
The founders debated about slavery, and a compromise was made. One of the them, Thomas Jefferson, was so uncomfortable that he said it out loud: “I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just; that his justice cannot sleep forever.”
Justice is no longer asleep. Let the entire world, for now and forever, see the outcome of the Age: when self-interest is not tempered with empathy, mercy, or regard for the humanity of the ‘other’, we condemn ourselves. This is the truth.
America is becoming a very painful place for those of us who are ‘white’. It has always been a very painful place for those who are not. Some white people are hurting because they are deeply into hate and fear; some hurt because they want to do right by others but are afraid to lose what they have; some hurt because they want justice, they want to make things right, and it seems incredibly difficult to do that at the moment.
If there is a way ahead, it will not come from politicians or commentators or theorists who babble and spin to catch people’s minds and push their agenda. That’s the same old evil. There is not one agenda that can move us past this place.
The way ahead will come from decisions made in the heart: to walk the long road from being inculcated and saturated with an idea, to being conditioned and somewhat aware, to piece-by-piece removing the conditioning, to repairing and aligning. Aligning with the innocent heart of another human being is aligning with God. We know that.
We’re told, and we cannot deny, that the land we are living on is ill-gotten. The surviving Native people whose ancestors were murdered, forced onto reservations, had their children stolen and brutally molested… remind us that they’ve been harmed, still are being harmed, and are having a hard time recovering. Knowing this, how do we align with the heart of Native peoples?
Co-opting and romanticizing their culture is not aligning. I’m just saying… be quiet and feel it. I am absolutely not suggesting guilt. I am suggesting cleansing of debris.
Next we come to a telling intersection. The wall that gave Wall Street its name, was built to protect the ‘new world’ settlers from incursions of Natives. Slaves built the wall. The Natives who were attacking were massacred, and their land was taken. Wall Street became New York City’s first official slave market. Wall Street, the symbol and the epicenter of rabid self-interest. If we could act from the heart, what would we do here, with Wall Street?
The slave stories with which the cesspool is filled are well-documented and fairly recent history for Americans. The last offspring of the last remaining slave died a few weeks ago. We would like to consider it far in the past, if not solved by the Civil War, then solved by Rev. King and Civil Rights. But of course it’s not in the past. It may actually be at its peak.
Unlike with Native Americans, whose numbers are low due to genocide, we’re more than a little bit afraid of black people when bad things just keep happening and happening. “Why does racism keep getting worse,” we cry in utter frustration.
Just a few days ago a young white man murdered nine black people in a historic church, after sitting with them while they prayed. He intentionally left one person alive to tell the story, as he was apparently planning suicide. He said, “They rape our women and they’re trying to take over our country. I have to do it.” His stated intention was to start a race war.
Within a few hours the Republicans labeled it as an attack on Christianity, the Democrats blamed it on the availability of guns, various others blamed it on psychiatric meds, Alex Jones knew exactly what was behind it (I didn’t bother to listen), anti-racism activists started aiming at the Confederate flag, and finally, there are, and probably will be more, videos explaining how it’s all a lie and nobody died.
The thing is, murders motivated by virulent racial hate and fear are not unusual. The difference between 50 years ago and today, is that 50 years ago nobody disputed why. Today the spin is dizzying.
But… hallelujah! This time it appears the spin is not working. The killer made it so obvious that it cannot be spun. So now we hear them asking who indoctrinated this terrified, weak-minded person?
Isn’t that a kind of silly question? He was indoctrinated by what IS.
I do have a heart, as do you. I do respond to truth, as do you. I do love, and I know you do too. My reverence for the black and brown human families is as deep as the ocean. In aligning with their hearts, I know I am aligning with Divinity. They are the ancient ones: our fathers and mothers, creators, full of the wisdom of experience, spiritually mighty. It grieves me, what is going on: grief for them and grief for all of us.
If you could do anything to change this cesspool we are walking in, what would you do?
Every bit of consciousness expansion and spiritual growth that we have experienced, leads us turn around and see the ‘other’ as another physical form of God. What we are doing is not unrelated to the Age, it is the culmination of the Age. Our spiritual evolution emerges because of this painful time period, not outside of or separate from it.
Praise and gratitude to the elder human families who chose to endure the worst in order to reach the highest, and anchor the divine ‘I AM’.
About the Author
Ida Lawrence is an author, blogger, copywriter and editor based in Atlanta, Georgia. She has authored two books on racial justice and human rights, and numerous articles on human rights, self-empowerment and related subjects. Ida is also a certified Tai Chi instructor with a special interest in helping seniors and the disabled with Tai Chi and Chi Kung practices modified for their use. Her goal in life has been to find answers to the question of ‘why’ and then to explore the question of ‘what is’. More of her work is available at her personal blog, http://talk2momz.com/.
This article is offered under Creative Commons license. It’s okay to republish it anywhere as long as attribution bio is included and all links remain intact.
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