Perpetual Victim Mentality is Doomed to Fail

J.P. Hicks, Contributing Writer
Waking Times 

Do you ever say “nothing good ever happens to me?” Or do many of your conversations with friends end with “can you believe what that person did to me?” If so, you may be suffering from a classic case of victim mentality.When I meet people like this, I always ask what they want to have happen in their life. And, inevitably, they always give me a blank stare. It seems they’ve been too busy complaining to formulate goals for themselves.What’s more, people who suffer from this victim disorder don’t realize that by constantly focusing on their complaints will only attract those gripes into their lives.

Success is actually a pretty simple formula: You are what you think you are. So if you’re always inferring that you’re a victim, you will always be a victim.

All it takes to be successful is to want to be and believe you are. I know for many reading this you’ll say it isn’t that simple. But it really is.

The hard part is putting aside the noise in your head that tells you you’re not good enough or that people are out to get you. Yet, once you make the decision to stop being a victim and to take control of your life that noise will disappear.

You will never hear a happy and successful person moaning about what someone else did to them. That’s because successful people don’t waste energy worrying about what other people did to them.

They may examine which of their own actions caused that person to lash out at them, but they treat it as a lesson and simply plow forward on their path.

It’s also crucial to understand that you have no control over what others may or may not do to you. You’re only in control of what you do. But that’s where your true power is.


  • Only you can control how your life turns out from this point forward. Sure, others may try to put up roadblocks or sabotage you in some way. That means they aren’t using their energy to better themselves and they will ultimately reap the karma of their actions.

    You, on the other hand, with new-found focus on what you want to happen I your life will ignore attempts by others to harm you.

    Holding onto a grudge is letting someone live rent-free in your head.” — Jeremy Cowart.

    If you want to be successful, you must dismiss all negative thoughts towards others who you believe are out to get you. You must put intense focus on your goals, what you’re grateful for, and what makes you happy.

    The good news is that when you shift your focus to your own path, you won’t have as much time to fret over what others are doing.

    This is where setting goals and keeping your thoughts organized is vital to overcoming a victim mentality.

    So go out and make your life what you want it to be.

    About the Author

    J.P. Hicks is an info-activist, pro blogger, editor of Blog Tips and author of a book about blogging. Follow @ Twitter, or like on Facebook and get the FREE ebook SEO For Bloggers.

    This article is offered under Creative Commons license. It’s okay to republish it anywhere as long as attribution bio is included and all links remain intact.

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